Clancy Wiggums - Lawman

Authored by: 
Published on: May 17th, 2010

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Clancy Wiggum

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Joe Mannix and "faithful secretary" Peggy Fair

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McGarrett and side kick Danno (of "book 'em Danno" fame).

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And finally - Jefferson Parish Sheriff ... uhhh S. Clancy Seagal. (He's looking for a Peggy Fair.)
Air time: 
Monday, May 24, 2010 at 4:55am

Book 'em

Look, cops have been brutalizing guys they don't like since time began.  That the America of 1968 was a bit shocked to see Chicago cops dishing these extra-legal beatings to political protesters was merely reflective of getting news cameras in the field.  Overnight middle-America needed to re-calibrate their image of cops as the fair, smart, robot-like professionals portrayed by Dragnet's Joe Friday, Adam 12's Pete Malloy and Jim Reed or The Untouchable's Robert Stack.  

The new TV cop model included emotions and even trendy ethnic side-kids.  Meet the emotional Joe Mannix of Mannix and over-wrought Steve McGarrett of Hawaii 5.0.  

  Down here in New Orleans (the Galapagos Island of America's cultural development) we have a separate reality.  Here we whisper to our out-of-town guests "whatever you do, stay away from the police - they make the Chicago police of 1968 seem professional."  Who Dat Say These Things?  My favorite oft-repeated quote from former police chief Warren Riley, was his claim to have fired, officially disciplined or suspended almost half of the 1,600 member New Orleans police force between Katrina and today.  Whoa!  

 

So what's the proper musical treatment on this topic?  

 

Let's start by splicing audio samples of dramatic versus comedic cop dialog.  Mix in the local element of Steven Seagal's dialog from the unreality show Steven Seagal - Lawman and the reality and fantasy completely blur into the absurdity that created Ignatius.  That's always been the true feel down here - a way of life built on a foundation of absurdity.  

Next Saturday night from midnight until Sunday 3am, songs about crime, cops, jail.  Between songs are interstitial sound clips from Hawaii 5.0.'s Steve McGarrett,  Barney Fife of Andy of Mayberry and The Simpson's Clancy Wiggum.  (Okay so I only got one real cop sampled - who else but the hyper-pretentious Jefferson Parish deputy, Steven Seagal would wear a mic?  Remember he's not an actor (he's just pretentious).  

 

And for all my drunk driver listeners, if you get pulled over during the show make sure you turn off the radio.

 

Oh yeah, then there was that emotionless, professional interplanetary disciplinarian who kept us wacky humans in line, Spock...  but that's for another show.

 

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