Music  Mecca

 

 

Five times a day the world's root music fans pray towards the WWOZ radio tower.   Today they all gather in the musical Mecca of New Orleans for Jazz Fest.  

 

So this is my big chance to make a splash in the baptismal water of New Orleans radio.   Last week I'm a no-show with food poisoning and tonight is a complete failure.  I dunk on the wrong basket, toss the pitch over the backstop, spike the ball on the five yard line, auto-goal, pit-stop into the stands.  

 

Yep this horrible show will shake the true-believer's faith.  Ears are melting around the world.  This the worst show to ever belly-flopoff our tower.  The themes tell it all:

 

Batman Versus Cheerleaders

Female Hipsters Versus Baby Factories

No Brainers

Intoxicating Chocolate Products

Country Boys Going to Jail and

Great Googly Oogsly Kookamunger Yama Yama songs to challenge the sleepy announcer

 

Here's the box score:

 

130   audio selection over three hours,

01:00  minutes per selection average without announcements

100%  scratchy, muddy, skipping recordings because all the music was looted after Katrina

100%  music for the post-Culture Vulture Music Appreciation Crowd who say; “We would rather dance than scold.”

 

 

Audio snippets from:

 

Vick the Vampire

Rocket J. Squirrel

Burt “I Can't Sing” Ward

Adam West

Hugh Beaumont

Barbara Billingsley

The cast of Star Trek and Wizard of Oz

Gumby

Elvira

Sponge Bob Square Pantalones

Charlton “My Constituents Don'tRealize I'm Senile” Heston

Mr. Rodgers

Peter Griffin

Groucho Marx

Marlon Brando

Rodney Dangerfield

Sargent Friday

The Warriors and an Obama crowd

Barbara Streisand and Ryan O'Neil

 

Thanks to:

 

The Hound

WFMU

WWOZ staff and volunteers and especially Dwayne for not firing me yet

Colton School for the live broadcast of Martin Medeski and Wood (Esq.)

Jazz and Heritage Foundation

New Orleans musician and fans

Our listener members and

Mary Milewski for neutralizing that evil plastic link to New Orleans' drunk drivers